Posts tagged life

2019 Life Update (3)

It was last week I last published a post here. Wednesday night. I did essentially no publicity for it, just put it on the blog.

It was something I had written on my way back from work.

Guess who’s writing another post on a Wednesday night back from work.

I’m pretty tired. Pretty, being that I’m too tired to describe how tired I am. I’m physically tired. Yesterday, I was very strong. I got home feeling like I could conquer the world, it was surprising.

Today, I had to run around a bit in my law firm. I have lots of pending tasks. And what bugs me… What really bugs me right now is that I’m unable to properly read my emails.

Guys, I read my emails. I unclogged recently, unsubscribing from newsletters I do not need. So virtually every email I get now needs to be read, but I do not read them. I have so many important links I’m not clicking, so many good newsletters I’m not reading. It bugs me.

I cannot even bring myself to click them this week, because of the huge amount of things I need to read this week in order for life to be balanced again.

What of next week? I’ve got a lot to fill in my law school log book. This week, meaning tomorrow and Friday, I have to find a way to register my business name at CAC because I’m leaving Lagos this weekend and the extra 28 days for me to forfeit my payment and the processes so far are already counting.

I’m still reading for law school despite everything.

Nevertheless, guess what I just saw: My Gratitude journal affirmation:

 

With Love,

Present day Debby to Future Debby.

2019 Life Update (2)

There are days when I remind myself that calmness is the way.

There are days I remind myself that poetry is my language, and that I can never, even if I try, escape solitude.

Living outside of home in the busy city of Lagos and hitching bus rides from the mainland to the island daily has left little to imagine, literary-wise.

I haven’t been motivated to document, I haven’t been inclined to create.
But I did travel home for a short while, and I enjoyed the familiarity of my family’s language, the shared laughter, the exquisite family altar.

Reading good poetry and writing in the space of my travel home, I was conscious of the fact that I’m slowly finding my way back to the heart of literature.
My love for law is unquestionable, but you can well question my love for a hectic and pensive life.

While I’ll love to practice, I would also love to dictate my hours. To study my bible, comparing translations with translations and journalling my findings. In the midst of which I’ll like to roll on the ground in worship. And no, Saturdays only won’t cut it.

While I’ll love to exercise my legal skills and contribute to the world of finance, I can tell you without a fee that I’ll like to read Wole Soyinka and Tiwalade and follow Rudy Francisco again. I’ll love to hold the pages of a book with a child and read to them, unrushed. I’ll love to imagine, and to create.

Law, literature. Where do you intersect? Where do you come alive?

But erhm…the part of that intense literature appears to suit the year 2020 better, or what do fellow students of the Nigerian law school say?


What do you think?

Love from this end,

Debby

My Playing Small Does Not Serve The World || + NLS Dinner Pictures

I hope to share more stories about myself. I hope to make you read relatable entries about my weaknesses and strengths. While I wait for the presence of mind and resources to write on these as well as I’ll love to, I try to chip in bits and pieces.

Tonight, when I type this, is June 18, 2019. I had my first term dinner tonight at the Nigerian Law school, Bwari campus, Abuja this evening. I decided to fill in my gratitude journal (which I’ll share all about in another blog post). After doing so, I started to read some old entries. Then I stumbled across this saved write-up which I was grateful for some weeks back, and which I’m still grateful for today. I heard it first in the movie, Akeelah and the bee. I must’ve seen that movie for the first time at around age 13. Here’s the quote written by Marianne Williamson which I’ll love to share with you:

“OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS NOT THAT WE ARE INADEQUATE. OUR DEEPEST FEAR IS THAT WE ARE POWERFUL BEYOND MEASURE. IT IS OUR LIGHT, NOT OUR DARKNESS THAT MOST FRIGHTENS US. WE ASK OURSELVES, WHO AM I TO BE BRILLIANT, GORGEOUS, TALENTED, FABULOUS? ACTUALLY, WHO ARE YOU NOT TO BE? YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD. YOUR PLAYING SMALL DOES NOT SERVE THE WORLD. THERE IS NOTHING ENLIGHTENED ABOUT SHRINKING SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WON’T FEEL INSECURE AROUND YOU. WE ARE ALL MEANT TO SHINE, AS CHILDREN DO. WE WERE BORN TO MAKE MANIFEST THE GLORY OF GOD THAT IS WITHIN US. IT’S NOT JUST IN SOME OF US; IT’S IN EVERYONE. AND AS WE LET OUR OWN LIGHT SHINE, WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME. AS WE ARE LIBERATED FROM OUR OWN FEAR, OUR PRESENCE AUTOMATICALLY LIBERATES OTHERS.”

Its a most beautiful quote. Today, I’m grateful that I am liberated to shine, unhindered. Unbothered by popular opinion, I can stand up to my own beliefs and smile for the camera.


Today, I do not ask myself who am I to be brilliant, talented, gorgeous and fabulous. Actually, who am I not to be? I am brilliant, talented, gorgeous and fabulous. I’ll even add that I am an embodiment of uncommon class. And more importantly, I radiate the glory of God.

But this wasn’t always so. I once asked myself all these questions. Sometimes, I still act in ways that show that these questions are still under the surface. Not withstanding, its all getting better. I’m getting better.

In this spirit of joy, here are few pictures from my first term dinner at the Nigerian law school.

A recurring thought to me from this dinner is the issue of fitting in. I believe a part of refusing to play small is refusing to struggle to be seen or to make a point. In your extreme quietness, you’re making enough point. And in your extreme fireworks state, you’re making enough point. Do not tilt to any side to gain the approval of men. Rather, tilt upwards to better yourself.

And I leave you with another quote, however by an unknown writer:

I AM A PERSON. I AM NOT A MACHINE, SPREADSHEET, AGENDA OR RÉSUMÉ. I HAVE A HEARTBEAT, SKIN, SCARS AND A SOUL. MY WORTH ISN’T CALCULATED IN EFFICIENCIES, RESULTS OR LADDERS CLIMBED. I AM NOT THE SUM OF MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS — OR THE SUM OF MY MISTAKES. I AM NOT MY AMBITION, ENERGY LEVEL, APPROVAL RATING, MASS APPEAL OR WORTH TO THE COMPANY STORE. I AM NOT AN A-PLUS OR D-MINUS. I AM NOT A MESS OR A MISCALCULATION. I AM NOT A MISTAKE. RATHER, I AM A MIRACLE. AND SO ARE YOU. BECAUSE I AM A PERSON, MADE OF LOVE IN THE HANDS OF GOD. I WILL BE A PERSON TODAY. I WILL BE ME. I WILL RESIST THE URGE TO BELIEVE I’VE GOT TO FIGHT FOR MY PIECE; GOD SAYS THERE’S MORE THAN ENOUGH TO GO AROUND. I WILL SEE THE BEST IN OTHERS AND RECOGNIZE THE BEST IN MYSELF. I WILL REACH FOR VIRTUE MORE THAN TROPHIES, DIGNITY MORE THAN STARDOM. I WILL CHOOSE ENCOURAGEMENT OVER ENVY. I WILL REJOICE WITH THOSE WHO REJOICE. I WILL STAND TALL ON THE INSIDE, EVEN IF I’M FEELING WEAK ON THE OUTSIDE. I AM A PERSON, A CITIZEN OF THE KINGDOM, WHERE THERE IS UNENDING GRACE FOR ME. BECAUSE I AM A PERSON, AND I BELONG TO JESUS

I hope as I let my light shine continually on this blog, I’m freeing you up to do the same. I hope I give you permission to live your truth today and always.

THERE IS NOTHING ENLIGHTENED ABOUT SHRINKING SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WON’T FEEL INSECURE AROUND YOU. WE ARE ALL MEANT TO SHINE, AS CHILDREN DO. WE WERE BORN TO MAKE MANIFEST THE GLORY OF GOD THAT IS WITHIN US…

AND AS WE LET OUR OWN LIGHT SHINE, WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHER PEOPLE PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME

If you need to be liberated from any of these questions too, go on ahead and while you’re in the process, celebrate yourself.

Shining as always, Debby.

Life Update 2019 (1)

Today

Hello gorgeous people. This is the third attempt to write this post – thank God this one is a success. I’ve decided to include my earlier attempts as they bear on all I’m discussing today.


Hey guysss. A life update post is due, yes?

Where do I start from? I’ve had an absolute back-breaking week. But its been a delightful week, all the same. I’m almost through with undergraduate studies. Exams are done and dusted, my project submitted today. All that’s left is to have the finalist send-forth program in my faculty, the send-forth in my fellowship too. Every other thing is by the way. Are you aware that I’ll be proceeding to law school this April? No, of course you aren’t. Well, I’m going. That one is a whole long story on its own!

Argh, I’m failing at this life update thing. Where do I even start to write from?


Now I know what to type unlike what I wrote yesterday. I’m not very fine. I’m not. I’m mentally spaced out. I had a scare this exam period with one of my courses – jurisprudence and legal theory. A real scare that kept me thinking I may have a carryover course for the first time ever, which means an extra year. An extra year when I ought to be at law school. An extra year which will depress me and shatter my esteem. So I prayed and confessed God’s word and was assured of his plan for me, especially seeing as I read for the exam, other things simply went wrong.

I’ve had to read so much for my exams, work on my project and plan the externalities involved with it, work on an assignment, justle re-establishing this blog along side, and carried on my head a responsibility at fellowship which felt like it was otherwise crashing at that time.

I’m not so fine mentally. Some days, I feel like my literal heart is heavy. At the risk of appalling everyone, I wonder if I have a rising blood pressure.

Yet in the midst of all this (in a week and a half), I’ve worshipped God and enjoyed beautiful times with him. But at other times, my heart is heavy. It is. I’ve panicked. Panicked about law school and if I was getting anything right, wondered if I was going to be late for my application.

I don’t know, but I don’t like having an heavy heart. I don’t like not being a free-spirited adult. I don’t want to be light and free simply because I’m not thinking of some stuff. I want to be able to think of all I need to and still be light. I don’t want to jettison anything to the corner of my mind like it isn’t real so I’ll have peace. I just don’t want to. I believe in having peace in spite.


Today

This past week I did all the running around under the sun that comes with completing my final year project. I completed my final year exams. I had major stress over completing my law school application in two days to meet the deadline. There was also the general trepidation of law school and the rush attached to the April batch.

In retrospect, I’m just a stickler for perfection; which is good once I can cast aside the worries that come with it. Till today while I type, a number of my classmates are still not through with the law school application or their projects. For everything we’ve had to do, out of 150+ students, I was always in the first seven to submit on the first day required and to do it thoroughly(by myself). So why fret, young lady? Oh young lady.

This leads me to remember an interesting passage in an even more interesting translation:

Phillipians 4:4-7

Always be filled with joy in the lord. I will say it again. Be filled with joy. Let everyone see that you are gentle and kind. The Lord is coming soon.

Don’t worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks for what you have.

And because you belong to Christ Jesus, God’s peace will stand guard over all your thoughts and feelings.

His peace can do far better than our human minds.

The last two paragraphs always do the wonder. Peace can stand like a guard over my heart. Peace isn’t passive and negligible, its a warrior (just like TY Bello and Sinach sang here). I get to have this peace simply because I belong to Christ. Thoughts and feelings have no chance before my skillful guard.

This applies to you too, my friend.

Onto other things, do you remember last year I mentioned that I wasn’t sure how blogging would go this year. Everyone says law school is a jealous lover, it wants all your attention. But I’ll be sure to come around as often as I can, even if its just to give you life update posts. I miss writing other posts. Please pray for me. Also subscribe to my newsletter because that is the only sure way of keeping in touch with me. Social media will fail.

Its good to write on here again, are you happy to hear from me too? It’ll be good to read something about your own life update too in the comment box.

Tell me, what do you also think of the new blog layout? If you need someone to fix you up with something similar, I have just the right contact.

Till next week Saturday (or so soon before),

Love and grace,

Debby.

2018 Life Update (4)

Here I am on the blog again.
What do I write on? I planned to write on TLC but perhaps you should simply read what I wrote last year + read up on the website.
Its been a long time I wrote about myself so here it goes.
I’m in my school currently. I plan on leaving for home this weekend. There’s been a strike for over 5 weeks now. Strikes and Nigerian universities.
I have a new ‘younger sister’ and I’m glad for the beautiful things God’s been doing in her life. She just left my room with joy.
I went swimming recently. Lol. I think the water is as fascinating as it is annoying. I’m undecided as to whether I rate myself well or not for my first swimming exercise. In my opinion I was fighting against the water, like you can’t control me you this water. But no one can swim without relinquishing control now, can they? At some point I sang some hymns under water and that helped me relax😀😀.
I’ve been trying to do a little exercise daily. Some people have asked why since I’m not fat. I know I’m not fat. I’ve even lost terrible weight. But I’m tired of having to pant a little after climbing two floors. I need to be fit and healthy. 😊
I’ve had amazing time releasing myself to God again. I’ve been going through my old Bible journal entries, I wonder when I’ll finish. You know the Bible chronicles God’s workings in the lives of ordinary people and many of them had real drama on their hands. I think my drama is little compared to a lot of them so it’s cool, God loves me in spite of my drama. I hope you know what drama means here.
I’ve had amazing time in worship too.
I’ve spent the longest time in the world working on my final year thesis/project. It’s astounding but I’m awed by it. I have a love-hate relationship with it, but I have a vision so it makes it all an amazing ride.
I’m like ‘2019 is here’ girl! What of all the plans you should begin to structure in for the new year? Haha. Anyway, I’d love book recommendations for next year (don’t think ‘oh she wouldn’t like this one’. Just recommend the books you’ve loved so far. Pretty please).
I don’t know what blogging will look like next year but I know what I will look like next year – stronger still, winning at life like the Deborah that I am. I love my grace.
I’m excited. Are you? I pray you get excited to move into yet another beautiful landmark in this life. I don’t do so as often as I’ll love but I’m praying for you. 😊
How did I do for a brief and impromptu life review?
💙
Love and light,
Debby.

Ways I keep the word of God bubbling in my heart

Hello fam! It’s Debby.
I felt slightly strange all week long when I didn’t put out another post on Wednesday. A week interval felt like a long time as I had gotten used to two posts a week. Mine! Glad I’m here now though. Students and Examsssssss!
Today, I’m interested in telling you all about how to keep God’s word in your heart. Does it really stay in the heart? And I’m not talking about being able to quote them. I’m talking of all-through-the-day meditation and application.
I’ll be going about it by telling you the things that work for me. They aren’t exclusive and I’ll like to know what other suggestions you have in the comment box.



1. Sincerity: I like to think I’m super sincere with God. I try to be. I tell him I’ve been finding bible-study difficult. I don’t pray because I’ve been told to, I pray because prayer is communing with him. You know how you’ll be glad to keep up communication with someone you’ll love to have as a mentor, someone who’s the buzz of your industry. If she/he spares you five minutes, you won’t use only two out of those five. You’ll even ask questions you already have answers to, just to keep them talking. God is so much greater than my inspiration or the next big thing. It’s a privilege to keep up the communication line with this brilliant artist, scientist, advocate, technician, teacher and more all in one. Whoa God.
So really it’s a privilege and you should try it. Prayer isn’t boring (once you get past the first few minutes, sometimes). Talk to him about your disinterest in reading the bible. You don’t have to start the conventional way, nor use verbose language, No. Communicate with Jesus.
He’s ready to help ‘‘God, I don’t feel like reading my bible o. I just feel like browsing. Smh for me right? Let’s try audio bible or what do you say…?’’. From my experience, before you’re through with your dialogue (don’t have your heart set on a monologue), you’ll have answers through a scripture that flashes by your heart or through sudden strength to read the bible. Be sincere. God is more interested in speaking to you through his word than you are even interested.
2. Listen to audio bible: This! I learnt it from both my parents especially my mum.
My first beautiful trial of this was through my campus fellowship. I was in 200level or maybe 100. The bible study team gave us the audio bible – “The bible experience” to foster our reading through the New Testament in a short time frame. I enjoyed it! Listening and reading the same translation simultaneously is epic. It always transported me. Subsequently, I’ve used it a lot. You also need this and not some ‘boring’ audio bible narration. I’ve listened to some that are slightly unbelievable in how dull the narrators are. “The bible experience’’ gives you different voices for each character and another for the narrator, all the background sounds are also mirrored e.g If it says Jesus went to the market place, you’ll hear market chatter. I recommend it.

3. Messages: I can’t say this enough I guess. Messages are wonderful because the preachers tell you from the sincerity of their hearts what they’ve understood over many years. You’re able to stand on their shoulders.
Truth is, you get the most of a message by repetitive listening and not just one time.
And as good as messages are, if you listen to many messages without studying your bible yourself, you may start to get confused. Why use the secondary source when you have the primary? What messages are to do is aid your comprehension of God’s word, help apply what you know in theory to everyday life, also give you theological perspectives etc.
4. Sticky notes: If you’re cool with using sticky notes, please do it. Paste them by your worktable. As long as you sit there, you see the memory verse smiling down on you. When I don’t want sticky notes to litter the whole place(which I never want), I write them in little papers like the one below and rotate them often. One stays on top for some days.

Put it as your phone’s wall paper like mine currently is:

just stick it around you. That’s why God’s instruction to the Israelites was:

“never forget these instructions that I am giving you today. Teach them to your children. Repeat them when you are at home and when you are away, when you are resting and when you are working. Tie them on your arms and wear them on your foreheads as a reminder. Write them on the doorposts of your houses and on your gates.’’ Deut 6:6-9

5. Make it your hobby: what do I mean by this? Don’t waste a moment. Since I got in the university I don’t suppose I’ve wasted the time used in re-organizing my wardrobe – I tend to do this quite frequently because, there’s no space 😊.
Every single time, I click on ‘play all’ for whichever book I choose, often the gospels and I begin to hear Jesus instruct his disciples. I follow him through the synagogue and down to his meeting the centurion. Its an experience really. I recommend this. Never let a moment for rearranging your wardrobe or folding your clothes go to waste – seeing you’ve read this blog post. Again I warn, never fold clothes for nothing.
Listen to a message when you’re cooking. I was telling two friends yesterday that I’m afraid those on the same floor with me would soon dub me ‘the message girl’. Every time I’m washing plates, I listen. Every time I’m cooking, I listen. That way, one point sticks and I get to meditate on it all night long. My mind has no free moment since I give it no choice. It picks up the things I’ve listened to and ponders. Try it; give your mind a new task!
That’s it! Basic but timeless. I remind myself of these things too when I start to slack off.
What do you use? Help us grow!

Love and Peace,
Debby.

2018 Life Update (3); Libraries, Retreats and Expensive Photographers.

Hello guys.
It’s about time for another life update post. I’m however tired of my previous format so I’m switching it up.
The discussion is on Faith, School and Photography.
School
There’s a library membership I registered for last year. The subscription is to be renewed financially every session. It was wonderful using it last year because the place is very serene and homely.
I hadn’t visited the library since this session started. Oh, I did once. Today’s the second time. I’ve missed this place. It has an effect of taking my mind off my daily routine. I’m glad that I’m back.
Still on the subject of school, my faculty is yet to release the approved project topics for we finalists this session. Everyone is asking. The delay is unusual and the first semester is almost over. I know we’ll be fine eventually. You won’t believe I still second guess the project topic I chose. I’ll keep you guys posted as the days wear on.
Photography
I think I’m due for new pictures but I’m not prepared for this entrepreneurial revolution of high prices. Let me explain:
I wrote this to my photographer friend on Sunday night:
So, this girl doesn’t have any professional picture. None for LinkedIn.
None for any publication she might submit.
None for her blog’s bio.
This girl doesn’t have semi-formal pictures. None for her blog posts which bloggers love to have.
This girl’s only photographer friend (she’s amazed at this by the way), is not interested in doing business. Since 2015 sef.
This girl has a classmate who took a beautiful and simple studio picture. This girl asked her classmate to link her up.
The photographer sent this girl a price list and this girl has been wondering if she won’t give up on the photographers of this generation for good.
You people that have photographer friends that take you pictures up and down, you are enjoying o. Enjoying a lot.
It started during my last birthday in September. Just two days before it, I thought “let me take some pictures sef” haha. It shocked me out of my wits.
come see problem. Problem problem. It makes me wonder; is it that the prices of the cameras they buy are so huge that they must make big profits out of each contract(I actually know the cameras and gadgets are expensive)? Or they get so few customers that the ones who approach them must be used as atonement for the bad business days?
Just a student here. Aren’t there photographers with good quality cameras that support the cause of students?
I’m just a student who doesn’t believe in using all her money on herself.
So Photographers, educate me.
Faith
I had a beautiful all-house retreat time this past weekend. It was enlightening. It’s actually a program organized by the assembly of all fellowships on my campus, but I purposed before hand that it would be a retreat session for me so I came prepared.
Still on the subject of Faith, this is currently my favourite scripture passage:

But I reckon my own life to be worth nothing to me; I only want to complete my mission and finish the work that the Lord Jesus gave me to do, which is to declare the good news about the grace of God.
ACTS 20:24

Remember my post strong friend, it must move beyond theory to practical. When last did you tell someone the brutal truth?
Love and Light,
Debby

My Three Types Of Mornings.

Hello people. Debby here again and we’re in a new space!
DebbyHub it is.
Soooo, today’s post is basically a lifestyle one that gives an example of my three types of morning.
I got the inspiration from Eureka naija.
P.s: Expect a post on Wednesday. This girl here is about to have an additional day for publishing posts. Twice a week. Saturdays and Wednesdays.
Enjoy.
The perfect morning.
1. Wakes up by 5:30am.
2. Stretches.
3. Has quiet time with God.
4. At 7:00am prepares 5-20 minutes meal
5. 7:10am Gets the bag packed and bed laid.
6. 7:20am showers
6. 7:30am scrolls through whatsapp messages, sometimes bbc news and emails (while eating).
7. 7:50am Calls a cab and heads to class.
Imperfect morning.
1. Wakes up 6:30am
2. Has quiet time with God
3. At 7:10am Prepares and eats cereal/ slices of bread.
4. 7:20am Showers
5. 7:30am spends impossibly confusing time deciding what to wear and getting the lipstick right.
5. 7:45am hurriedly lays bed, packs bag and calls a cab.
6. 7:55am runs out of the room for the day.
Oh-what-have-i-done morning.
1. Wakes up 7:00am
2. Stares at the alarm clock again
3. Prays and boils water for bath.
4. Realizes electric kettle didn’t work and tries again.
5. showers at 7:25am.
6. At 7:35am the world is a mess. No befitting clothes or shoes. Bad hair day.
7. 7:45am straightens bed, clears work surface.
8. 7:52am stuffs belongings into bag and sprints out of room.
8. Walks till a bike is in sight.
9. Gets to class 8:10am.
If you’re new in the blog, I’m currently a 500level law student at the University of Ibadan, Nigeria. I wrote this with my 8am classes schedule.
So what do your three types of mornings look like? Give a summary of if in the comment section or if you’re a blogger you can do the same blog post and give me a tag, I’ll like to know.
😘
Love,
Debby

2018 Life Update (2)

Currently at: A picnic organized by the youths of my church to commemorate our fellowship’s anniversary.
Thinking: about maturity. If I say it has nothing to do with age, that would be extreme. But age doesn’t define maturity at all.
Eating: nothing at the moment. I just ate rice though. One more thing, guys, I love oats and considering the whole world has been saying it’s one of the healthiest meals you can eat, I’m pumped. One thing though, I need interesting ways of preparing my oats. I’ve seen too many good pictures of awesome oats on the internet. So I want berries and almond nuts and other fruits. Enough of plain oats and milk.
Pondering on: the situation of Nigerian youths. Hmm. My thoughts on this one needs processing before its made into a blog post. This space wouldn’t take it.
Reading: too many things. I just abandoned one book on accents ( you say potato). It didn’t turn out to be what I expected – it has too much details on the phonetic symbols. Its oral English all over again and guys, that’s water under the bridge. Secondary school issues. If you want to teach me on accents, make it interesting please.
Another book I’m on is “The fall of babylon“. “Mere Christianity” by C.S Lewis too. Those are the books im reading amidst several articles.
Wanting: new friends. I’d really love to meet new minds. Help me. Emphasis: new minds.
Listening to: Reckless love. You just may be dissapointing the blog family if you’ve still not listened to this song. I referred to this song in my last life update. It’s real. I may start up a play list segment on the blog to let you know the songs I’m loving – still a probability.
Encouraging you to: Develop yourself. No one will do it for you.
For another encouragement, watch this video. It’s just seven minutes, thirty one seconds and I think it would do you nothing but good!
Guys, while you’re here, read old blog posts. 😀
Love you.
Debby.

2018 Life Update (1)

Hello.
I try not to get too consumed in other blog plans, so as to leave out updates on my life.
Sometimes though, I do not know how to succesfully pass across all I’m going through. Sometimes, I do not even know how to blog. Do we ever really know how to do some things? Expertise may just be a hoax.
Reading: Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi. I’d heard good noise about this on the internet since it got published. I hope to review it someday.
Also, I’m re-reading Daughter of Destiny. It’s the only authorized biography of Kathryn Kuhlman. I told an old friend recently that I try to re-read that book every year. I vividly recall something I heard Bishop Oyedepo say in a message I listened to. He said he re-reads Kenneth .E. Hagin’s books every year because that is a huge part of his faith origin. Every year, the busy bishop Oyedepo, much older than I am, makes out time to re-read the same books and read others. Obviously what you focus on, shapens your life. If there is a book which marked a significant turning point in your life, you can make a yearly commitment to it. 
Thirdly, I’m on Living as a Christian by A.W Tozer. I love A.W Tozer’s style. He is that familiar uncle I never met. I don’t mind going over a chapter repeatedly.

Wanting: My own apartment. I like having my own space a little too much. I told my mum that someday, I’ll really love to have my house before I get married. A place where I can just customize. Preferably a minimalist setting, with lots of awe-inducing wall art.
Right now, I love my roommate but I get bothered about the issue of space. Isn’t it okay to just have my things the exact way I want them to be – unruffled?
When I do reflect, I think it just goes to show my personality and a weakness in that personality. Life is in sharing. People won’t always have the same priorities I have. Therefore, if I have to sweep four times a day because I do not like any dirt, well then, so be it. Sweep, and live out my current personal apartment-less life.
Wearing: New lipstick occasionally. Make-up is as much a mystery as it is a controversy in some circles. In some other circles, it’s just feminine, nothing attached.
Having: daily battles with my flesh. Sometimes, I will do every other thing but pray. Every other thing. No matter how many spiritual things you do, if you do not pray, you’re cheating yourself. When I say pray,I do not mean collective prayers but personal. 
At a group retreat recently, someone made mention of the reason why some people pray saying “the God of Babalola, the God of Adeboye“. Those ministers have personal spiritual ‘net-worth’. This isn’t about the communal anointing that occurs when we gather to pray. Rather, a personal spiritual weight harnessed in the place of prayer.
Eating: fruits of late, because something has to work atleast.  My plan was to prepare lots of food at this period and store them. I had plans to make soups but I can’t, because, erratic power supply. In other words, I’ve been missing my African dishes. *cue dramatic sigh of a Yoruba girl*
Missing: Family trips.
Hoping: For an audible subscription from a friend. Lol. Hoping for a Cassie Daves blog planner from a friend.
Listening: To nothing much of late. My phone isn’t reading my memory card currently so most of my songs have been out of reach. My favourite song of late is Reckless Love by Steffany Gretzinger. It’s a Bethel music song.
I also miss listening to audio bible.
Trying: to tie together this thing called adulting. Making decisions. Being taken seriously. Being looked up to. Working.

Encouraging you: to stick to one thing like a postal stamp, until you get there.
Well, that’s what I saw as a quote somewhere. Your life encourages people with the littlest of things sometimes. There is someone on instagram who encourages me with her huge love for dogs. Imagine that. She is just living her life, loving dogs, yet she inspires someone. It gets as simple as that. I’m here making sense of this blogging thing in the midst of a thousand and one confusions and then occasionally, someone tells me of how the blog is a blessing to them.
 I think doubt surely follows any good thing. In an article I read on Zadie Smith(a writer) today, in answering a question on any secret techniques to coping with self-doubt, she admitted that:

” In the end, you just have to write and doubt simultaneously”

Don’t bother about the doubt accompanying what you’re creating,  just do it. Stick to it, like a postal stamp, until you get there. I know you will get there.
That does it for the day. Thanks, see you next week.
Love, adulting, prayers,
Debby.
Can you relate to something I shared? How are you faring? Pray tell in the comment box.