Posts tagged strength

Baby Blogger Steps; Taking new strides after a crisis

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There are fail-days. I go through them. I got extremely tired and had no desire to touch my blog this past weekend.

I had had a draft post I was to edit and put up on Saturday. It had also been a couple of busy days leading up to that moment, so I didn’t get to check up on the post.

Saturday morning; I got a devastating email from Mailchimp – my newsletter service provider. Very very devastating news. My account was suspended as soon I clicked “send newsletter”. My very first newsletter!

An account I constantly created for over a month – through the poor network, lack of professional skill, mega data expenditure, and so much time! My entire account was suspended just like that, and without using it once after set-up.
Boy, was I frustrated. I tried pushing that aside. I thought ‘let me atleast edit the blog post for today’. It was then that I found out the post was still too raw and I was in no mood to create a masterpiece. I just shut it all down.
I thought to myself that I may as well space out this blogging thing for a while.

But, I’ve since had time to get my energy back particularly since I got a personal message from a blog reader today thanking me for my consistency and how my last post blessed his life. Ah well. I’m back to this place. We will work the newsletter again, amen?

Like a person who had an accident, I’m here planning to take baby steps again after my blogging crises. Baby blogging steps today means simply writing as I want to – reminding myself that I do not need to be pressured on any front. I am growing and being. I am simply content being here this Sunday evening, 18:29pm in front of my laptop while a message plays aloud on my phone and birds tweet outside my window.
Today, I just want to put up some pictures on my blog and have fun while doing it. Its delightful being a baby blogger, yeah?

While I’m baby-blogging, I want to encourage you to “baby-do” whatever big thing is crashing right in front of you. Just take the baby steps at it, do the basics. Sometimes its enough.

Not everyday a masterpiece, sometimes just paint, write, be.

A/N: So this post is coming up many months after the crisis. Said crisis occurred at the end of January this year. I think I’m sharing this today because you need to baby-do whatever big thing is crashing right in front of you. But do not stop.

Being an adult requires doing lots of things, and sometimes doing them alone. It can be wearying, and while its not wearying to me right now, I want to tell whoever its wearying to right now, “take baby-steps”.

A baby doesn’t stop walking because he falls. Interestingly, the parents are amused with the baby’s bounce and fall, as its a harbinger of good news, our child is developing.

Sweet child, your father says your occasional fall shows you’re developing. Relax, and live in stride.

Your fellow baby sister,

Debby.

Hacksaw Ridge — Movie Recommendation

I’ve struggled with how exactly I want to go about writing this post. Unlike Captive, I can’t summarize it, I’ve tried, it gets too long and my account I think, is too underwhelming, but I’ll try.
The title is Hacksaw ridge and it appears boring at the start. I could’ve been discouraged at how silly the star actor was when he first fell in love but I persevered.
Since I persevered and learnt from it, let me attempt a recap while encouraging you to see it. Or atleast learn from it too.
This story is really just a story of commitment. And of bravery.
When you make a commitment, stick to it. Believe in it and wait by it even when you’re the only one doing so.
Would you believe if I told you Desmond Doss was the only man to go into world war II (and one of the fiercest war spots for that matter) without bearing a single arm or firing one, and yet he was the one who received the highest rank after the war. Would you believe me?
Desmond who valued his faith so much and went into the battle bearing his bible and no guns*. He was no stranger to rejection.
The war was on and America needed more young men to enlist to fight. Desmond did. At the training facility, he was repeatedly ridiculed, scorned and ostracized for preparing to go into battle without touching a gun. He insisted that he enlisted to be a medic because he wanted to help his country but he had no intention of ever taking a life, war or not.
For this reason, the commander framed him for disobeying an order and he faced the military tribunal at the risk of really being sent to prison if found guilty.

His courage to serve and not give up was inspiring. He knew what he was there for and he didn’t mind missing his wedding just for that! (Wedding).
He believed the war was justified but that killing wrong.
When asked:

But why is it so important to you to go into battle when you won’t touch a rifle?

He said:

But when the Japanese attacked Pearl Habour, I took it personally. Everyone I knew was on fire to join up including me. two men from my hometown, declared fire unfit, they killed themselves because they couldn’t serve. I had a job and a defence plan, I could have taken it but that ain’t right. It isn’t right that other men should fight and die, that I would just be sitting at home safe. I need to serve. I had the energy and the passion to serve as a medic – right in the middle with the other guys, no less danger just while everybody else is taking life, I’m gonna be saving it.

With the world so set on tearing itself apart, don’t seem like such a bad thing to me to want to put a little of it back together”

Located ontop of a 400 foot cliff with the Japanese heavy weaponry, war ship range and brutal soldiers, was Hacksaw Ridge on the island of Okinawa. That was the location of a near-impossible mission during the second world war.
On site, the battle was as fierce as expected and death was hosting the party. Desmond Doss got to work in the midst of the chaos; saving the wounded by first aid treatment and getting them back to safety. He didn’t give up on anyone no matter how badly injured they were. He kept this up for the period they warred.

On one of those days, it was a fierce battle and the soldiers, it appeared, fought a loosing war. The battalion was commanded to retreat. And while everyone did that, Desmond couldn’t. He knew he heard his GOD calling to him in the voices of the wounded and dying soldiers who were crying from pain and certain of death from the enemy. [It reminds me of that line in the hymn “where duty calls or danger, be never wanting there”**]
Desmond Doss got to work pulling the fallen soldiers from the battleground even though he had no one to support him. That day, the Japanese came down from the other end where they camped and upturned the rubble looking to ‘finish’ anyone that wasn’t already dead. Inspite of his close shave with death, being the only uninjured American soldier on ground, he escaped being seen and kept on dragging his injured and fallen soldiers to safety all through the night and all alone. His hands bled from pulling on the rope he used to let them down the cliff, but he kept on. His strength failed but he kept on.
And while he did that crazy work, he kept muttering “please help me get one more. Lord, one more” On and on he continued until his soldiers discovered wounded soldiers from America who were being let down mysteriously. They were able to come back for him in the morning.
That night, he had singlehandedly in the face of fire saved 75 dying men and given them hope by using a rope to let them down the cliff. Desmond did this despite being about the smallest in size to them all. That night, he had given hope to his commander and commrades who had fallen (legs blasted, gunshot wounds etc) and who thought they would writhe in pain till they eventualy die (either from the brutal Japanese or the pain). Desmond Doss had given hope to those whose families were waiting for them back in America. He was shaken but he made it back fine.
He became the only inspiration for which these other soldiers would agree to go to the battle front the next day. They knew they wouldn’t just be casualties left to die, they would matter in the scheme of things. If they fell, they may be brought back to die at the American camp.
So again the next day, Desmond rescued them as they fell.

And finally, he courageously gave up himself to keep the people out of terrible harm’s way in an act of kicking two greenades away from his team. He got injured; but the deed was already done – the Japanese were already defeated. What few was left of them surrendered.
Desmond Doss was the hope giver, the life saver. The bible-but-no-arms bearing soldier who said “With the world so set on tearing itself apart, don’t seem like such a bad thing to me to want to put a little of it back together” and he did just that.
He was the first to receive America’s highest medal of honour for service above and beyond the call of duty.
The movie was directed by Mel Gibson. Written by Andrew Knight and Robert Schenkkan. Running time: 139 Minutes
The movie has this website.
P.S: In case you’re still unsure, it’s a true life story!
* His refusal to bear arms at all during a war wasn’t because he condemned other Christians who did so. It was borne out of a pledge he made to God in his teenage years after two close shaves with almost killing people.
** if you’re not used to KJV English style, “be never wanting there” means you should volunteer to help in time of need. We shouldn’t be in need of help and you’re wanting (not available).
I hope you’ve been inspired.
What do you think? Have you seen this movie? Are you inspired to do so?
Love light, and courage
Debby.

Hello Strong Friend.

Hello precious people. Welcome back to this space. How’s life going? I really want to know, feel free to ramble away on how life is going in the comment box. I also advise you learn to journal some of your thoughts down, it helps to analyze your feelings. I don’t do so everyday but for the days that I do, it’s amazing.
Today, I’m sharing part of what I wrote down last year and I was suprised to re-read this year.
I wrote this sometimes last year:

God, I want to cry.
I so want to cry that I can’t type. I just want to cry on someone. For being so strong for so long, I want to cry. I just want to cry for everyday that’s gone by. I want to cry.
My lecturer cried in class today and it’s broken something inside of me, I just want to cry.
I got to IVCU fellowship office today, and in the outer office, I heard some of my friends’ voices inside. I didn’t want to go in because I would have to be strong in front of them.
Since when did that start? Friends you can’t cry in front of?
Friends you can’t break your walls in front of.
Am I like that to other people?

The structure of my campus fellowship’s office is basic: you step into a room, call it your reception area. Then there’s a door leading to a store by your right. Still in the ‘reception’ area, there’s a door in front of you that leads to what we often refer to as “the inner office” or inner court (in reference to the Jewish temple).
The walls are made of thin wood, and it’s really just dividing one big office. You can understand that the voices carry.
The context: That day, my lecturer had cried in class and it surprised me, surprised everyone. But it did something more to me, it made me want to cry. I had something to do at my fellowship immediately after my class and I hadn’t cried yet ?.
Discussion: It’s alright if I didn’t want to break down in front of more than one person but the real issue was the thought that flashed by my mind making me think I had to be strong in front of people.
Strong. Strong? Who is strong please? Such a relative word. Truth is there is more strength in vulnerability than in ‘bold face’.

Since when did that start? Friends you can’t cry in front of?
Friends you can’t break your walls in front of.
Am I like that to other people?

The real question was whether I had friends who would turn away rather than cry in front of me. I’m not talking of general acquaintances. The few and deliberate friends.

Cornelius Lindsey, I referred to him in this blog post, put this picture up on instagram. A part of his caption says:

“To be the strong friend is a desirable position because it means you’re valuable and useful.
Unfortunately strength turns to weakness when it’s used without rest and replenishment. That’s why it’s important for strong friends to have true friends who s/he can be honest with when asked “HOW ARE YOU?”
So strong friend, don’t hide behind pride! Answer honestly for your own sake. I know you help others, but you need help too.”

It’s got two aspects. Check on your strong friends selflessly.
Two, allow yourself to be checked on. Don’t turn back. Go in. No pride allowed here.
There’s a saying that goes:

“Good friends never let their friends cry alone”.

I tell my friends ‘make me a good friend please, don’t cry alone’. Na beg I beg.
A problem shared is a problem half solved. Be deliberate about your friends. Don’t just let friendship happen to you. “We’re in the same group, so we’re friends; we work together, so we’re friends“. That’s cool on a surface level but you must have friends you can tell the brutal truth. Brutal, being the emphasis.
My message to you: Choose your friends, then trust them.

Truthfully,
Debby.
Go on ahead, how are you doing?