Blog

Life Diary

Consistency game in 2017

image
Hiiiiiii this new year! Glad to be here again. I’ve been everywhere except here and I thought I was fine with that until about a week ago, I started feeling really stuffy. Like the air outside of this blog wasn’t enough. The only way the world would be right again, was with this blog. As I began typing this, the first emotion I registered was relief. I’m back.
I’m back. Whew. I’m back. So it’s a new year. For the first time, I can emphatically (emphatically I stress) say I heard God tell me somethings about the year. It wasn’t even like I waited and waited. It was his mercy that made it come easy.
I know it’s just a few days but I’ve been getting so much from this year already. It feels foreign; the amount of courage and vision I have. Even for this blog. I reject laziness. I reject comfortable complacency. So I’m here.
I’m here and I’m sorry for my ups and downs. For leaving you whom I enjoyed being with, for leaving you hanging.
I remember reading once on Cassie Daves‘s blog that

“If content is king, then consistency is queen”

It stuck with me.
In the period I was actively away from this blog, I began to believe it was the reverse. Consistency works wonders. My absence has told it’s tale on the blog but it’s a new year and I’m ready to work with everyone. Express myself better and make this an open platform for expression.
The beauty in us is too much to be closed up. Good news: I really am relieved and joyful and I’m typing fast.
Happy new year guys. 2017 is a year of triumph. I love you. I await your comments.
Content and consistency,
Debby

Life Diary The Christian Faith 1 Comment

Hey Beggar.

image
“Kneeling there in deep contrition”,
That’s what a line from an hymn we sing in church says
Today, I see you folded by the streets
It’s a Sunday morning
I’m not feeling up for church
You’re kneeling by the road too
Regardless of whether you’re up for it or not
We’re both ready to get what we need
Poor as we are
You, poor materially,
I,  poor in spirit
In desperate need of what only Jesus can give
Whether I feel up to it that day or not
 

The Christian Faith

Teachings: FAITH

image
Not having faith is like saying “God hasn’t done it”
Faith is acting on God’s word. It’s the second thing after you’re convinced  something else has taken place. In this case, it’s the second thing after God has spoken his word. 
Not claiming” by his stripes I am healed”, shows misunderstanding of the truth of God perfecting my healing already. I don’t know it has happened. 
Faith is a function of “I know whom I have believed in and I’m persuaded… “1 Tim1:12
Faith means not believing your senses only. It’s dropping your intellect for God’s word. It’s unlearning all you have grown up to know,  because it doesn’t conform to God’s word. That’s why it’s hard for the best of us to have faith. You grew up believing contrary to what you must now believe to have faith.
“but I put my body under, I bring my body under subjection…” 
This is because it is no longer I that live but Christ that lives in me” Gal2:20
Knowing that my old man has been crucified with Christ, the life I live I live through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ who loves me and gave himself for me
Thus my body can’t rule me. Physical senses can’t dictate. My body is ‘it’.
I have a new ancestry. For whoever is in Christ Jesus is a new creature, old things have passed away and behold all things have become new 1cor5:17
Jn3:13 “if I have told you of earthly things and ye believe not, how then shall ye believe if I tell you of heavenly things? And no man has ascended up to heaven except he that came down from heaven, even the son of God”
Even things Christ considers earthly, we find it hard to trust him on those subjects, how much more greater things he wants to relay. Most of these things we have difficulty with,  are things that have actually happened before and we know it. Healing; we know all divers kinds of miracles have happened but we just find it hard to key in. How much more the great and mighty things he wants to show in jer33:3? 
Noah for example had never seen an Ark built. Had never witnessed rain nor heard of it. What’s my excuse? I say I’ve never been to a big healing revival of hundreds of thousands of people, only read of it. Noah read, heard, saw, dreamt nothing. God spoke.
And Go is still speaking today. To me. To you. Through his word. “If only ye believe, ye shall see the glory of God” John 11:40
Faith affirms the integrity of God’s word. Faith is based on the word of God and if God hasn’t spoken there is absolutely no basis for faith.
God, I thank you for your word.
image

The Christian Faith 3 Comments

Dear Fearful Christian,

Sweep the ocean floors
will you?
I will do so with you
We need little water
little
Just up to our necks
Every once in a while
Watch the fireworks at night
Will you?
Let nature perform it’s wonders
and your eyes the gazing
Your mouth the laughing
Let your mind be awed
Let your skirt like mine sweep the sand of the beach
Flutter in the wind
Try it
Loose the bands on your hair
You won’t be unholy
Just the wind. A little wind
Call out to the God of zion
He loves air just like you do
Don’t be afraid.
You’re still holy
Let it echo when u find out
What holiness really means
image

Fiction 5 Comments

Mean girl's words

Hiii preciousssss. Happy new month. Noticed the changed logo? I took the picture on sept2, my birthday. Yaaaaay ! Maybe sometimes I could go into the story of what I learnt through my birthday this year. You could indicate in the comment section if you’ll like to read a post on it, already I’m getting excited. Wishing you a happy September as you read mean girl’s words. True words.
It’s been all your life staying at home
You complained murmured and snorted
And sometimes baked unfit donughts
But it was home
The flour, the smell of freshly baked snacks
The customers were your entertainment
Your eyes were Forever rolled as you attended to customers
Your voice was flat
Yet it was home
You made mockery of those you tagged ‘trying to form’
But I won’t call them ‘trying to form’ ,
 I’ll say those group of people were your age mates to whom you felt grated knowing they could afford what u couldn’t
You knew how to laugh with your coworkers till you got watery eyes and your stomach felt empty
It was a baseless laugh and it echoed while you thought it would somehow fill the void inside of u
Don’t call me wicked. No, don’t. I’m not yet started.
Your blue uniform fit like it was the missing end of a jigsaw puzzle
It was home… For you
Yesterday,  you left home
Today,  your face is painted
You’re in a red cloth , perhaps this will come Close
Your steps are unsure
You’ve jested, you were all knowing once
Today it’s you, out of your comfort zone
Today it’s you trying on the new things
They don’t fit
Your voice is softer
Your face undefined
Where’s the permanent snort? 
And the ladies with the real designer bags laugh at you while you Jerk past them, your feet singing a tune different from that of your wedge shoes
Today,
You’re new here girl here
And there are rules
While you’re at your own home
Try being kind
image

Life Diary Non-Fiction 10 Comments

A day in Adeola Odutola law library

image
I spent over ten minutes asking this library attendant to get me a book behind him. Over ten minutes. I was patient. I was being a Christian. I asked politely, simply. He ignored me blatantly yet slyly. He collected money from people who came to renew their library cards and gave them change and checked the list to be sure they had paid, he answered them just as they came up after me.
I felt weird. I felt abused. I was very patient, my voice loud yet small as something inside of me felt more inadequate the longer I waited. There was a guy beside me, who came after me, he asked for a textbook. Library attendant whom I’ve always greeted politely, stood up from his chair, got the book for him, sat back. The same guy asked for another book, the man stood again, got it for him. Before he sat, I asked him to get mine. A girl can never fully know if it’s her gender thats causing the bias. He ignored me, looking at others who came for library card renewal. You get that kind of pretence stance.
Something in the back of my throat knotted. I walked inside the library without the book. Tears were close. For what reason? Thoughts came, because I didn’t use makeup? Because I was polite? What was my offence? Why wasn’t I firmer in demanding when he delayed? Why did I want to cry? Why did I want to cry? Should I have been rude? Why? Why?
I’ll go back. I’ll tell him I demand a textbook. Another of my choice now, I’ve had time to rethink what I want to read. I’ll embrace the knot that formed at the back of my throat. It will speak better things for me in the years to come. I’ve lost a coat. I’m going outside now to offer another.
It’s surprising to me too, but this happened to me.
So what’s your view people?
-on the religious aspect
-On the tears
-gender
-and other themes
Fight or flight for you?

Book Reviews 8 Comments

BOOK REVIEW–The Atonement Child

Hello again!

Before my two weeks semester break from university began, I was certain I was going to read so many books. I was only yet to draw out the list of fiction, autobiography and Christian literature I would read. I was only yet to.
The break has turned out entirely different but I’m grateful for how it finally turned out. It’s been tough keeping up with certain demands in my fellowship but I’ll probably never build so much strength without it.

A good thing that came out of the break was that I completed a book by Francine Rivers. I did so in no time, really. In this book, Francine pushed forward some strong views. In light of my previous reading of her works, doctrinally, she came on tough.

The title of the book is “The atonement child”, authored by Francine Rivers.

My copy was published by Tyndale house publishers inc, Wheaton Illinois and it has 376 pages.

I was in a Christian library the other day, when I saw a book with a colourful cover page on a shelf.
It’s title – ” Aids is real and it is in our church“.
To be honest, I can imagine most pastors swiftly yet steadily glancing away with sufficient experience, from that book with the colourful cover page. But aids is in our church. Who’s gonna pick up the book? Against that backdrop, “The atonement child” is also a book that hinges on a topic that makes us all avert our gaze to the side. It’s based on a somewhat sensitive issue: Abortion.

In a moment too short to have had the weight and consequence it eventually had, Dynah Carey was raped. Painfully. Brutally.
Beautiful Dynah, sweet Dynah, blonde-hair Dynah, God-adoring Dynah. Her life had been close to perfect. I enjoyed reading how she went down to New Life College in Illinois to school and how she met Ethan who swept her off her feet. However, her life hit rock bottom after the rape and she was forced to reconsider everything she had ever known, and forced to put things in perspective, one day at a time.
The main characters were Dynah; Ethan, her fiancé; Hannah, her mother; Doug, her father; Joe, her friend; Evie, her grand-mother. Quite a circle. The characters are very credible and they has so many emotional decisions. The characters seemed to have been faced with trials they couldn’t bear, they ran into lots of problems.

My favourite character is Dynah. She was able to pull through beautifully (this involved lots of tears and questioning God, running away, quitting school) but it serves to tell how much dignity can still be pulled on, in ugly circumstances. If I told you who my second favourite character is, I’ll probably begin to gush and digress and I will mention my third favourite. You already know I love the book, I don’t need to make it any more obvious.

My favourite part of the book has to do with a certain widows brigade meeting. Some elderly women who were close friends and met together every Sunday for the past four years to share lunch, sorrows and joy. I liked that potrayal because it touches on vulnerability and on the courage to call on the commander of the army, to go to war against the enemy.

This book while focusing on Dynah, was able to efficiently branch out to the lives of people affected by abortion: The doctors who perform it, the families of the doctors and what they felt or didn’t feel, the parents of those who aborted and reasons for supporting or opposing it, the men for whom pregnancies were aborted and their dispositions for the rest of their lives , the pastors from whom counselling was sought, their errors and their excellence, the schools with no tolerance policy for pregnancy and the blind eyes turned to rape circumstances, the government and the position of the law, pro-life support groups and what they really care about.
On the issue of pro-life organizations, this book subtly dealt with why these organizations should focus more on the women thinking of having or who have had abortions and should not only be concerned with ‘saving the child’
This book had exceedingly thrilling points despite it the solemn theme.
I’ll recommend this to all and sundry because we all have a thing or two in perspective about abortion which needs changing.

On having Pastors having no answers :

He looked into her eyes and saw fear and confusion, her anguish. He wanted to weep. He knew the answer to that question in his heart. He knew the answer by all he had studied over the years in the word. But he couldn’t bring himself to give a one word answer to such a loaded question.

 

On Christian zeal:
Douglas had noticed that when they first met Ethan.  “He’s on fire alright but that kind of fire can burn churches down”

 

On grief:

she had thought she had cried to last a lifetime when she was nineteen. Now she realized she’d had no clue what grief was. She hadn’t known how deep it could go or how long it could last and that there were ramifications she hadn’t suspected.
Sometimes when she read her Bible, she envied the Israelite. They could wear sack clothes and ashes. They could wail and scream. They could prostrate themselves before the lord

 

On trials:

anger stirred. Frenetic activities seemed to be Ethan’s forte. And safety valve. When he didn’t want to face something, he served mightily as for the lord. But not really. It was easier to teach God’s word than to live it

 

On people’s justifications for abortion:

“it would seem life could be built upon the foundation of death”.

“besides the supreme court doesn’t agree with you. They seem to think we poor women would fall apart if we knew the facts, so they decided women don’t have the right to know the full truth” she shook her head “they’ve made it legal to withhold vital information, even when a woman asks for it…and do you know the argument they used for withholding information? They say it spares women trauma…”

 

On facing the truth:

“she lifted her shoulders slightly, unable to explain, not sure she wanted to diagnose her feelings. Perhaps it was best not to examine some things too closely. You might find corruption.

 

On compromises made for love:
she hadn’t wanted to think about it too much or look too closely, not when the love of her life was so intimately involved. She couldn’t bear to think he might be wrong

 

On worrying:

He brushed a tear from her cheek. “you’re borrowing trouble, Dynah. You’re worrying about what might happen. Deal with now”

 

On love for Children:

“I remember my son going through a period in the seventies when he said he didn’t want to bring children into such an awful world, ” Evie said” I told him people who cared so much about children should be the ones having them”

Love and books,
Debby.

Life Diary Non-Fiction 7 Comments

FASTING

We all need to write from a place we get. A familiar place and for that I thought:
God, food, family, quiet
The thing with fasting, she thought, was that it was never fully familiar. You could do it and get used to it on most days but on certain days, it was no respecter of persons. It clubbed and clubbed until the soldiers defending you dropped down their defences and you were under seige. Captured. Your stomach desolate. Burnt down like Jerusalem*.
In this case however you’re not really comforted by knowing a day is coming when you will eat. All your focus is on that moment. That day. Perhaps an opening for a meal will arrive. Can it arrive? You know it won’t. So maybe all the prophecies brought by Isaiah and Jeremiah did not pump up the Israelites. They had lost their glory beyond redemption as they saw it.
But God had a plan.
Dear stomach, on days you’re lost and depressed, God has a plan. Jerusalem was restored. Yaaay people. Yaaay.
* Jerusalem’ capture is recorded in 2 Kings 25 and see Haggai2:9 for the hope for the later house.
N. B: I’m no foodie. I just have to write about the things on my heart, you get it:)?
Though our outer man perishes, our inner man is being renewed. Yaaaay?.
Love and more fasting,
Your girl,
Debby.

Life Diary 4 Comments

life lately

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii. I’ve been well. Better. I’m shining. How have you been?
Remember my post trigger words? Well I read one of my ‘trigger blogs’ and I knew a post would come up today. Sincerely, I enjoy reading that blog, it’s one of my model blogs.
You see, the thing with lifestyle blogging, is that you’re not perfect. And no one wants to see a perfect blogger in the first place. We want you, and your imperfections, coupled with your efforts. No, we don’t want you when we see no effort. get better. That’s the thing. Work towards being the best version of yourself. The version that doesn’t need ‘editing’ before an audience.
Having said that, lets get right back to the business of the day. I’ve been AWOL. You have kept here, thank you. I value you. I’m back in school and school has it’s own world, if you haven’t heard. I have a lot of responsibilities but I’ve immensely missed being here.
The thing with book review, for we book lovers, is that you get a perspective into the book, you may purchase the book based on the review and even if you don’t, you got to savour another taste for the moment the book review lasted. I love book reviews. I find myself starting to enjoy book reviews on the blog best. However… I find it hard to read anything other than prescribed textbooks for my course of study. *Rolls eye*. I get to steal a chapter or two from some Christian literature each day though.
I just miss getting a book, the feel of the book between your palms and over the next few days or weeks when that book follows you everywhere. In your bag, on your desk, by the gas cooker, on your front porch and every other preposition in relation to you. Does any other person get that feeling?
I’ve read reviews on Yaa Gyasi’s book “homecoming”. Its my new desire. ToBeRead. You could buy it for me too?
Unto other matters, I’m preparing for exams. I enjoy learning about the law with absolutely no pressure attached. Just discovering new principles, exploring what went on in court rooms etc. I pray this exam period however, I won’t suddenly get overwhelmed along the line with how much I still have to cover and “pour down” in the exam hall.
I’ve also been learning so much more about prayers. Reading about it, talking about it and doing it of course.

“satan does not care how many people read about prayer, if only he can keep them from praying” Paul E Billheimer
“prayer is not learned in the classroom but in the closet” E.M Moody

So it’s beyond reading and hearing about it.(or watching it. Cue cue, “war room” movie)
I’ve been eating. I think that’s a crucial part of a person’s existence. I’m just not having fit-fam healthy meals. It’s hard to maintain that as a student. School has it perks though and I’m grateful I’m in school right now.
On that note, that will be all. that’s a brief update. I shall be back soon, hopefully – having massaged more books also.
Till then, keep shining.
Love and happiness,
Debby.

Life Diary 12 Comments

Hello "knowees"

Hiiiii.
I think the Internet is a strange place. Personally I’ve always been uncomfortable about people I know reading my blog(unless you’re really close to me) .
I’ve always been more comfortable when strangers find my blog and relate to it. In fact when you relate to my writings as a stranger, you delight me. Strangers turned family. Truly, we’re more alike than we think.
On the other hand, I feel the need to make the blog ‘something more’ for people who know me in person.
So, as I get to hear from people I know as the days roll by, that they read my blog, I just feel weird. Does that happen to anyone else? Anybody?
What then is the deal? I am a world? in myself. I love music yet I don’t appear to music lovers, to love music. If someone who knows me in person reads a blog post where I write about music, I wouldn’t ring so familiar to them. Yet I really do love music. Do you get me?
How-to-deal
Someone once said “perfect is the enemy of done”.
If I keep after the perfect post, the perfect post, there wouldn’t be a post.
If I keep after maintain the right picture of myself for everyone I know then I wouldn’t be me. I’m a world in myself, thank you very much. And I choose to express myself. See, its Debby’ expression. A place where I don’t have to shout to be heard.
A big shout out to all who know me and read my blog. You don’t always have to be silent. Comment once in a while;) and let a girl smile.
Yeah the spotlight is on my ‘knowees’ today. Happy Sunday.
image
Love and Peace,
Debby.