Posts tagged law

2019 Life Update (2)

There are days when I remind myself that calmness is the way.

There are days I remind myself that poetry is my language, and that I can never, even if I try, escape solitude.

Living outside of home in the busy city of Lagos and hitching bus rides from the mainland to the island daily has left little to imagine, literary-wise.

I haven’t been motivated to document, I haven’t been inclined to create.
But I did travel home for a short while, and I enjoyed the familiarity of my family’s language, the shared laughter, the exquisite family altar.

Reading good poetry and writing in the space of my travel home, I was conscious of the fact that I’m slowly finding my way back to the heart of literature.
My love for law is unquestionable, but you can well question my love for a hectic and pensive life.

While I’ll love to practice, I would also love to dictate my hours. To study my bible, comparing translations with translations and journalling my findings. In the midst of which I’ll like to roll on the ground in worship. And no, Saturdays only won’t cut it.

While I’ll love to exercise my legal skills and contribute to the world of finance, I can tell you without a fee that I’ll like to read Wole Soyinka and Tiwalade and follow Rudy Francisco again. I’ll love to hold the pages of a book with a child and read to them, unrushed. I’ll love to imagine, and to create.

Law, literature. Where do you intersect? Where do you come alive?

But erhm…the part of that intense literature appears to suit the year 2020 better, or what do fellow students of the Nigerian law school say?


What do you think?

Love from this end,

Debby

A day in Adeola Odutola law library

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I spent over ten minutes asking this library attendant to get me a book behind him. Over ten minutes. I was patient. I was being a Christian. I asked politely, simply. He ignored me blatantly yet slyly. He collected money from people who came to renew their library cards and gave them change and checked the list to be sure they had paid, he answered them just as they came up after me.
I felt weird. I felt abused. I was very patient, my voice loud yet small as something inside of me felt more inadequate the longer I waited. There was a guy beside me, who came after me, he asked for a textbook. Library attendant whom I’ve always greeted politely, stood up from his chair, got the book for him, sat back. The same guy asked for another book, the man stood again, got it for him. Before he sat, I asked him to get mine. A girl can never fully know if it’s her gender thats causing the bias. He ignored me, looking at others who came for library card renewal. You get that kind of pretence stance.
Something in the back of my throat knotted. I walked inside the library without the book. Tears were close. For what reason? Thoughts came, because I didn’t use makeup? Because I was polite? What was my offence? Why wasn’t I firmer in demanding when he delayed? Why did I want to cry? Why did I want to cry? Should I have been rude? Why? Why?
I’ll go back. I’ll tell him I demand a textbook. Another of my choice now, I’ve had time to rethink what I want to read. I’ll embrace the knot that formed at the back of my throat. It will speak better things for me in the years to come. I’ve lost a coat. I’m going outside now to offer another.
It’s surprising to me too, but this happened to me.
So what’s your view people?
-on the religious aspect
-On the tears
-gender
-and other themes
Fight or flight for you?