Currently: sitting by the window facing the front porch of my house. Watching a flower dance in its pot. I’m occasionally gazing at the tree in my neighbour’s house. I choose to blog
 
As we grow older, our capacity ought to expand. I refuse to be a 12 year old girl in a 3year old body. At 3 years, the toddler could and would drink water. At 12, she can and would drink but with much more capacity than she did at 3. capacity.
Normally, I’m all shades of good. So I hated it as in turns my good natured attributes got ruffled. The calm superfluity I had, began to dissolve and I saw anger, I saw unforgiveness and I just wouldn’t believe it.
The truth is, it was the new me. I had grown.
 
When a flower grows, it loses it’s form, grows in every direction, still the same bright leaves, it blooms and glows. It’s still gracious but it has thorns sticking out, it is formless unless the gardener takes the shears and prunes.
 
John15:2: “…and he prunes every branch that does bear fruit, so that it will be clean and bear more fruit”
 
A few months ago, I saw unforgiveness was very very ugly, I tell you. Every time I pictured the devil as a young girl, he was ugly but the unforgiveness I saw, was uglier than I had ever imagined. It baffled me. It was sticking out of me. I was able to forgive eventually as God helped me.
 
2cor3:5 “not that we think we are of ourselves sufficient to do anything but our sufficiency is of God”
 
 
The case this time around wasn’t forgiving someone else. It was forgiving myself. I did something I regretted, to put it simply. I didn’t want to pray, I felt I had failed God. Then I remembered some Christian literature I had read saying after you’ve sinned, God is most ready to hear you pray. Ask for forgiveness. It is cheating to think you’re ‘protecting God’ and hence refuse to speak to him with your defiled self. He wants you to come so he can wash you and restore you.
 
So it’s two themes in my head: Forgiveness and Writing. I have obtained forgiveness from God but how about that other theme? See, I got encouragement to ask for forgiveness without wasting time because I had read.
 
I know people who still read. This blog inclusive. Thus, I’m writing.
 
I don’t believe one who was “despised, and rejected, who endured suffering and pain. No one would even look at him, we ignored him as if he were nothing “Isaiah53:3 yet was enduring the suffering that was meant to be ours, would now choose not to forgive us when we return to him. No.
 
It turns out that my last blog post had a major theme of forgiveness. I gave some excerpts, some of which I’ll quote again. We need to forgive people. We need to forgive ourselves and accept God’s forgiveness. As we grow, we need our spirit man to grow so we can forgive better than we did yesterday because today’s offence is stronger than that of yesterday. we need to love more fiercely. We need more.
The quotes:
 

“I did it to myself . I did it to myself. mea culpa, mea culpa”

Is not the strategy to take, nope, and that’s because
 

“God doesn’t condemn he forgives”

Yes
 

“She looked at him bleakly: ‘your kind of love can’t feel good’
‘Does your kind feel any better?’ she looked away.
He unlooped the reins. ‘right now love doesn’t have an awful lot to do with feelings‘ he said grimly
‘don’t misunderstand I’m as human as the next man. I feel alright. I feel plenty right now, a lot I wished I didn’t’ “

he says love doesn’t have a awful lot to do with feelings. God loves us inspite. Just come
 

” he[Jesus] was a man of sorrows, acquainted with bitterest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way when he went by. He was despised and we did not care. Yet it was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down. And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God, a punishment for his own sins!” Isaiah 53;3,4

Still in doubt?
 
 
Currently: sitting by the window, my back to the flower still dancing in it’s pot. My body given to typing and eating something yellow again( I did not plan it, seriously!) loool.
What has been your experience on giving and accepting forgiveness?
FORGIVENESS
 
Love, forgiveness and yellow meals
Debby

0 Comments

  1. Bassey Etim May 28, 2016 at 4:28 PM

    “It is cheating to think you’re ‘protecting God’ and hence refuse to speak to him with your defiled self.” I really liked that part.That remains the difference between Judas and Peter. Peter denied Christ and Judas betrayed Him. Both men felt bad afterwards but Peter did not hang himself like Judas did but rather ran with the rest of the disciples to the tomb when he heard Christ had resurrected. In fact Jesus had to say to Mary, “go and tell my disciples and peter also”. He had him on His mind. Our prayers are a delight to God and more so after we have grieved Him. Really nice writing! Kudos!

    Reply
    1. debby000 - Site Author May 28, 2016 at 9:16 PM

      Yes. It really is the difference between Peter and Judas. Lovely point you raised. Oh and the delight to know God still has us in mind.
      Thank you for the wise and kind words. I treasure them.

      Reply
      1. Bassey Etim May 29, 2016 at 8:53 PM

        I thank God for His mercies, it’s really comforting to know its always there. It has been a wonderful experience communicating with you. Thanks!

        Reply
        1. debby000 - Site Author May 29, 2016 at 9:17 PM

          Same here. You’re most welcome☺

          Reply
  2. ʐaʀaʍ May 28, 2016 at 8:36 PM

    Nice work on forgiveness.
    Its amazing how the hardest person to forgive is yourself. I’ve dealt with that a lot. Still am…

    Reply
    1. debby000 - Site Author May 28, 2016 at 9:20 PM

      There is a lot we still have to grow up to. Inability to forgive one’s self always results in inability to receive God’s forgiveness which is vital.
      We learn, try and achieve daily so i get when you say ‘still am’.
      Thanks for stopping by.

      Reply
    1. debby000 - Site Author June 1, 2016 at 9:48 PM

      Thanks Judith☺

      Reply

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